“For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” – Ephesians 6:12
Bible Verses About Controlling People
The Nature of Control
As we explore the concept of controlling people, we recognize that control stems from various motives, including fear, insecurity, and pride. We often encounter situations where we feel the need to control, thinking it can lead to better outcomes. However, the Bible teaches us that true power comes from surrendering control to God. We can see this in how Jesus demonstrated humility and servitude, rather than exerting power over others. Control can lead to manipulation and strife, while God’s path leads us to peace and love. By understanding the nature of control, we can adjust our hearts to seek God’s wisdom rather than our own vain desires, fostering relationships based on trust and faith.
Proverbs 16:32
“Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city.” – Proverbs 16:32
Galatians 5:22-23
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” – Galatians 5:22-23
Philippians 4:5
“Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.” – Philippians 4:5
Proverbs 25:28
“Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control.” – Proverbs 25:28
James 1:19-20
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.” – James 1:19-20
The Dangers of Manipulation
Manipulation is a form of control that can harm relationships and damage trust. We understand that in holding onto the reins tightly, we may create an environment filled with anxiety and fear. The Bible warns us against such attempts to manipulate, urging us to bring our worries to God, who cares for us deeply. Instead of trying to control others, we should focus on our actions and motivations. By doing so, we can create uplifting connections that honor God and one another. Let us be mindful of our influence and handle it with grace, steering clear of mind games that push people away.
Colossians 3:12
“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” – Colossians 3:12
Romans 15:1
“We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves.” – Romans 15:1
2 Corinthians 1:24
“Not that we lord it over your faith, but we work with you for your joy, because it is by faith you stand firm.” – 2 Corinthians 1:24
Ephesians 4:29
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” – Ephesians 4:29
1 Thessalonians 5:11
“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:11
God’s Sovereignty Over Control
One of the most comforting truths we can hold onto is that God is ultimately in control. We may think we have the power to steer our lives and those around us, but God has a divine plan that is far beyond our comprehension. It’s during these challenging moments of wanting to control that we must learn to trust Him completely. We know that surrendering our desire for control can bring about profound peace, as we’re reminded in scripture that He knows all our needs and guides us in the right way. By placing our trust in His plan, we transform our attitude toward control from one of anxiety to one of faith.
Proverbs 19:21
“Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” – Proverbs 19:21
Isaiah 41:10
“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” – Isaiah 41:10
Psalm 37:5
“Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this.” – Psalm 37:5
Jeremiah 29:11
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11
1 Peter 5:7
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” – 1 Peter 5:7
The Importance of Communication
Effective communication is at the heart of any relationship, especially concerning the topic of control. As we desire to lead others, we need to remember that God’s call for us is one of love and respect. Open, respectful communication fosters trust and understanding. When we communicate with the goal of building each other up, we move away from controlling behavior to a more cooperative dynamic. Listening to one another, acknowledging feelings, and valuing differences enables us to live out our faith in action. Thus, we can glean the wisdom from the Bible to develop our communication skills to nurture our relationships without manipulation.
Proverbs 18:13
“To answer before listening—that is folly and shame.” – Proverbs 18:13
James 1:19
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” – James 1:19
Ephesians 4:25
“Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body.” – Ephesians 4:25
Proverbs 15:1
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” – Proverbs 15:1
Colossians 4:6
“Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” – Colossians 4:6
The Role of Trust in Relationships
Trust plays a vital role in our relationships and our response to control. As we tend to want to control outcomes, we sometimes forget that relationships thrive on trust. In the Bible, God emphasizes the importance of trusting one another and Him. By building trust, we create a safe space for openness and honesty, paving the way to deeper connections. Trust allows us to let go of the impulse to control and, instead, fosters an environment where we can support each other through faith. Let’s build trust in our relationships, leading to a foundation that reflects God’s love and grace in action.
Proverbs 3:5-6
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” – Proverbs 3:5-6
Psalm 118:8
“It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in humans.” – Psalm 118:8
Lamentations 3:25
“The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him.” – Lamentations 3:25
Psalm 146:3
“Do not put your trust in princes, in human beings, who cannot save.” – Psalm 146:3
Hebrews 13:5
“Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.'” – Hebrews 13:5
Overcoming the Need for Control
Many of us struggle with the desire to control situations and people in our lives, but the Bible teaches us that true peace comes from relinquishing that control. So often, our need for control stems from fear of the unknown. However, we find strength and comfort in God’s promises. As we seek to overcome our inclination to control, we can turn to prayer and scripture for guidance. Together, we can lean on God, allowing His light to shine through us in our daily interactions, letting others know that we are guided by love and compassion rather than fear of outcomes.
Philippians 4:6-7
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:6-7
2 Timothy 1:7
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” – 2 Timothy 1:7
Psalm 55:22
“Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.” – Psalm 55:22
Isaiah 26:3
“You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast because they trust in you.” – Isaiah 26:3
Romans 12:2
“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” – Romans 12:2
Final Thoughts
In our exploration of controlling people, we discover a wealth of wisdom in God’s Word. The verses we’ve shared highlight the importance of love, trust, and effective communication. As we navigate our relationships, we are reminded that true power lies in surrendering our need for control to God. By letting go of the urge to manipulate and instead embracing the attributes of patience, gentleness, and self-control, we foster deeper connections that reflect God’s grace.
It’s not easy to change our perspectives and habits when it comes to control, but we can lean on God and each other for support. Together, we can overcome the fear that often drives us to control our circumstances. Let’s place our trust firmly in God, allowing His peace and guidance to lead us in our relationships.
As we seek to grow in this area, I encourage you to read more about the lessons learned from other scriptures, like Jeremiah 23:1-6 or the wisdom shared in Proverbs 30:11. May we continue to grow in our faith, embracing love over control and building each other up just as the Bible instructs.